BACKSTORY: You-man Nature

Hey folks, welcome back! I’ve been reeling in a lot of new readers as well so if you’re new here, welcome bunny!! Lovely to have you! Today we’re talking about a poem from Little Girl Blue titled You-man Nature.

Earlier this week I posted an excerpt of the poem on my insta story with the caption: “This poem is about sex and fornication.” With a bunch of cheeky emojis following. Whilst this caption wasn’t lying I’d like to dive a little deeper into the backstory of the piece.

This poem is one of the shorted pieces in Little girl Blue for the simple reason that I had one thing to say and it didn’t need too many metaphors to get the idea across (As is with many things – I just get over excited sometimes).  That idea being there are more important things in life than sex. AND WE ALL KNOW THIS but do we act like it?

I remember one evening sitting in the car with my parents driving back from what I recall as probably a church event. I was much younger than I am now and that is one of the reasons this poem found a place in this collection: to show how I thought about certain topics even at a young age. Such topics being one of the biggest themes in this collection: Sex. On this drive, I saw for myself and for the very first time- prostitution or sex work in progress. Setting aside my parents disapproving remarks about what the girl was doing outside at this hour; my attention drew closer the man who was entertaining said prostitute. What was he doing here? Didn’t he have a wife or a girlfriend. Could this woman dressed in skimpy clothing on a cold night be his girl? Doesn’t he have work in the morning and finally what was it about sex that made men so willing to pay for it and lurk around at night to find anyone who was simply willing to have it with them.

This poem is structured in the following manner: The first stanza expresses my confusion at the ‘need’ for sex. More specifically so called ‘immoral sex’. That is sex out of wedlock, sex with prostitutes, and adultery. I was well versed in the reasons why I could not and should not have sex but that was not my concern. My concern and rather what I was more obsessed with was understanding the desire. This desire for a satisfaction that one could not simply wait for. I have always believed that there is joy in the wait. And I believe everyone who’s ever waited to have sex with a person they truly valued (or anyone who’s ever waited for anything for that matter) understands the value of that joy. However, it seemed – as I was looking at the situation from my 15-year-old mind, that when it came to sex that joy in the face of an extremely attractive individual was thrown to the curb for a few minutes of fun in exchange for money.

I make a point of comparing the joy of sex to honey flavoured water. This is in an effort to say that yeah, flavoured water is good to taste and it makes you feel good but is it good for you? And even if it is, is it better that the benefits of pure, clean water?

A life with an active and perhaps not socially acceptable sex life was, to me, honey flavoured water. In comparison to a life without: “Pure, untouched fresh water.”

I understood fully that eventually sex would be a part of my life (“eventually we all taste honey”) making a note that at such a time, I should not feel bad about the fact that I would crave such things in my life (“Why do we apologize for it?”); It’s part of life and is natural.

The last stanza makes an effort to sort of comfort me. By telling myself that yeah sex is cool and all but perhaps abstinence is really where it’s at. That having an active sex life is an attractive lifestyle (especially to the youthful eye) and if that’s the life you’ve chosen cool. Don’t feel bad about it but a life without feeding into all your desires is ‘safer’ so you ought to be mindful of that.

The poem is titled human nature because it recognized that sex is part of the human experience and the desire to have it is not what people should be shamed for. What you should be ashamed of is the inability of self-control. Allowing your human desire to put you at risk of contracting a bunch of sexually transmitted diseases, perhaps not having enough money for what truly matters in life because you blow it all on the women you sleep with or destroying the all-important relationship with your life partner because instead of spending the night with them you opted for a fun night out of town.  The Hu in human is changed to YOU to express the idea that giving in to such desires serves no one but you. That it is a selfish act. Again putting strain on the importance of indulgence. Is it really worth it?

 

If You liked this post, please leave a comment below with your thoughts. Or even better share this post with someone else! I love you for reading!! See you next week! xx